I’m mortified to have to admit that my 3-month-old baby daughter may have, probably, most very likely, did drink another mother’s breast milk yesterday. Here’s what happened:
Upon picking her up from daycare (I call it school when I like it), I grab her bag with leftover bottles for the day. I usually take four full bottles of breast milk in for the day. She usually drinks three of these, some days four. Never only two. I take the sheet that lists what how much she drank and when she drank it, put it in the bag and head out the door.
Once home I start to unload the bag of bottles and put one in the fridge. This is what I usually do, put ONE in the fridge. This day, however, there were two bottles full of milk. What?
- I brought 4 full bottles.
- She drank 3 full bottles.
- I came home with 2 FULL BOTTLES!
OMG! What did she drink for one of those three bottles today???
So, this clearly isn’t my fault, except that I’m a mom and moms blame themselves. I’m the one who sends her to daycare. I’m the one who works. I’m the one who should be feeding her. If she didn’t have to get a bottle, there would never, ever be the possibility that she could be given another mother’s milk. It simply couldn’t happen.
I wasn’t intending to write about this, but think that it might help another mother who is dealing with working-mom guilt. Who is punishing herself for sending her child to school (see, I’m trying to turn it around here by saying school). We do what we have to. It’s not our fault. While I am pissed this happened, and I normally don’t say the word pissed on the blog, I don’t think my daughter is going to be harmed by this. I’m going to assume this other mother has perfectly fine and safe breast milk. That she doesn’t do drugs or drink too much alcohol. That she doesn’t have some illness that could possibly be transmitted through her milk. I have to believe this or I’ll go crazy with guilt for not protecting my daughter.
There’s a flip side to this story. What about the mom whose milk my daughter drank? What did her baby get that day? Either one less bottle of precious liquid gold that she lovingly sat and pumped for her baby or nothing. If my milk, that I drained my breasts for my loving daughter, was given to another child I would be just as pissed as I am that my daughter is the one who drank someone else’ milk. It’s a no win situation.