The end of breastfeeding. This may seem to personal for some people to talk about, but it’s an important milestone in a breastfeeding mother’s time line of her baby growing up: When the milk runs out.

It’s a happy and sad day all in one. I have to think it’s like letting your child go off to school … you’ll finally get to change his/her room into that creative space you’ve always wanted; you can run around the house naked; you can do whatever you want, when you want. You’re excited he/she’s grown into the beautiful person you always knew he/she’d be. But, and I know it’s a big but, you’ll miss him/her to pieces. This is not unlike the end of breastfeeding.

Gone are the long middle of the night wake up calls when only you can feed the baby.

Gone are the sore nipples.

Gone is the struggle to get your baby to latch on properly.

Gone is the worry of leaking through your blouse during a business meeting.

No more carrying around a nursing wrap to shield the public from seeing your breasts.

No more pumping milk when you are away from the baby to make sure your milk supply keeps up.

No more washing out the pump parts and lugging the pump to work, on trips, and storing the milk with a cooler so it won’t spoil.

So, you’d think I’d be ecstatic that I have all this free time on my hands.

Then I think there will be no more alone time, bonding with my baby, watching her nuzzle at my breast, drinking the magic milk that only I can provide. No more antibodies for my baby when she’s sick. No more passing along all the good nutrients from breast milk. But I’ll have time. Lots of time.

What the hell am I going to do with all this time?  I’ll hold my baby and feed her a bottle and tell her of the time I used to breastfeed her. Hopefully she’ll look up at me with the same sweet smile and give me a giggle just like she did when it was just her and me.

This is what I’ve been drinking lately. It’s a wonderful little tea that helps breastfeeding mothers produce more milk, and I think it works just as well to help you relax (which, helps produce more milk).

I was first introduced to this drink while in attendance at a weekly breastfeeding mother’s tea offered by the breastfeeding education center at our local hospital. It’s here where mothers of newborns (under 8 weeks of age) would meet up, drink “Mother’s Milk tea,” and talk about boobs, diapers and our continual lack of sleep. “Time for tea” quickly became a necessity in the week.

Drinking the tea now reminds me of the early days of learning to feed my newborn, to care for her and to care for myself. The tea offers calming effects far greater than just offering more milk.

I can’t say this stuff really works to increase your milk supply, but I can attest that one day I feared my milk was done.

Gone.

Over.

It was too early for this to happen so I ran to the nearest Whole Foods and bought some of this tea and quickly made a cup. By the next time I needed to produce milk, I had some. I breathed a sigh of relief and began drinking at least one cup of this a day. They say that you need to drink it four times a day for it to really work, but I think it’s worth it no matter how much you drink. The calming effects alone are helpful to breastfeeding moms. Who couldn’t use a calming cup of tea?

You can buy it in many stores, but if you have trouble look in your “natural” stores in the herbal section.

And, bonus, each bag offers an inspirational saying on the tag.

I’ll miss this tea when I’m no longer breastfeeding, but I might try one of the options from the tea maker’s line of “Woman’s Tea.”

Today, a coworker told me about a nurse-in (a bazillion moms decent on one location at the same time, to nurse their babies in public) that is happening tomorrow (Friday) at a local Chick-fil-A. We chatted about it at lunch and I didn’t think anything more of it. Then, I read about it on the Moms at Work blog and posted a comment.How It Started

Apparently, there was a woman who was asked to cover up while feeding her baby at a Chick-fil-A — she was, allegedly, handed a kitchen towel to do so … from the General Manager. You can read the story here and here.

The Law

If I didn’t have to work tomorrow, I’m not sure I would attend myself, but I have to support those who are willing to do it. There is a Florida law protecing the rights of mothers to breastfeed wherever they need to. I stress the word *need.* When a baby needs to eat, she needs to eat NOW. Not, when it is convenient to be in the *appropriate* place.

I’m not a mom who can breastfeed well in public. It’s the part I’ve never been comfortable with. The best thing I ever bought was a nursing wrap so that I was always covered. But not everyone has one or can use a wrap. Nor is it always convenient. I bet this General Manager never tried to hold a wriggly, hungry baby in one arm, and with the other hand pull up his shirt, unattach or move a bra, get the baby’s mouth appropriately attached to his breast — all while trying to stay appropriately covered. If he had, I’m sure he’d never brought over that kitchen towel.

I can appreciate any patrons of a restaurant or public place, not wanting to see any breast parts, but the reality is that women can’t always hide it when a baby needs to be fed. We need to educate people that this is natural and if you don’t want to see it turn your head. As a breastfeeding mother, I try to be sensitive to others and always cover up, but if the only way my baby is going to get a meal is for me to show some boobage for a few minutes while I sit eating my chicken sandwich and waffle fries, then so be it.

Related:

• Information on location, etc.

*UPDATE — Aug. 14, 3:50 p.m.*

• OrlandoSentinel.com story of event 
• Wesh.com story of event 

The Orlando Sentinel’s Beth Kassab wrote a great article today about breastfeeding and working moms. An important issue.

As a working, breastfeeding mother (whose done it once before) I have to agree with her sentiments that women need a work environment that supports this cause. I am fortunate to have had an office with a door at both companies where I worked while still breastfeeding. For those without offices, there were other, private, options available. A friend of mine works for a company that has a room dedicated to nursing mothers. I’m sure it’s the reason many who use it are (or have) continued to breastfeed. But we might be in the minority. Kassab shows statistics about just how many don’t have a supportive company.

On one of the Internet groups that I participate in, one mother complained one day about having to pump at her cubicle only to have her coworkers complain to the management. She was not given a room with a door to express milk in private. This is horrifying — not that someone would complain about having to sit next to her when they could hear her pumping. What is horrifying is that the only location she could find at work was at an open space at her desk. Good for her for not giving up, but she deserves better!

Mothers on the message board jumped in letting her know there were laws in Florida where companies have to provide a private space, and it can’t be a bathroom.

While I know that not all companies can dedicate a breastfeeding room all the time, when a lactating mother returns to the office she should be given a private room to use at some location on site. Kassab states the benefits for companies:

According to the Business Case for Breast-feeding published by the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services, employers who provide the right environments experience lower health-insurance costs and claims for women and their infants, lower turnover rates, less absenteeism, improved productivity, and increased company loyalty.”

Related:

• Read Kassab’s entire article here.
• It’s World Breastfeeding Week — find out more.
• Breastfeeding state laws.
• I’ll post more about breastfeeding in the near future. Stay tuned.

I’m mortified to have to admit that my 3-month-old baby daughter may have, probably, most very likely, did drink another mother’s breast milk yesterday. Here’s what happened:

Upon picking her up from daycare (I call it school when I like it), I grab her bag with leftover bottles for the day. I usually take four full bottles of breast milk in for the day. She usually drinks three of these, some days four. Never only two. I take the sheet that lists what how much she drank and when she drank it, put it in the bag and head out the door.

Once home I start to unload the bag of bottles and put one in the fridge. This is what I usually do, put ONE in the fridge. This day, however, there were two bottles full of milk. What?

Let’s review:

• I brought 4 full bottles.
• She drank 3 full bottles.
• I came home with 2 FULL BOTTLES!

OMG! What did she drink for one of those three bottles today???

So, this clearly isn’t my fault, except that I’m a mom and moms blame themselves. I’m the one who sends her to daycare. I’m the one who works. I’m the one who should be feeding her. If she didn’t have to get a bottle, there would never, ever be the possibility that she could be given another mother’s milk. It simply couldn’t happen.

I wasn’t intending to write about this, but think that it might help another mother who is dealing with working-mom guilt. Who is punishing herself for sending her child to school (see, I’m trying to turn it around here by saying school). We do what we have to. It’s not our fault. While I am pissed this happened, and I normally don’t say the word pissed on the blog, I don’t think my daughter is going to be harmed by this. I’m going to assume this other mother has perfectly fine and safe breast milk. That she doesn’t do drugs or drink too much alcohol. That she doesn’t have some illness that could possibly be transmitted through her milk. I have to believe this or I’ll go crazy with guilt for not protecting my daughter.

There’s a flip side to this story. What about the mom whose milk my daughter drank? What did her baby get that day? Either one less bottle of precious liquid gold that she lovingly sat and pumped for her baby or nothing. If my milk, that I drained my breasts for my loving daughter, was given to another child I would be just as pissed as I am that my daughter is the one who drank someone else’ milk. It’s a no win situation.